Monday 27 April 2009

The "Thank Gawd for Shit" Campaign: Jebus Unleashing Swine Flu Vengeance?

Some time back, I have initiated a "Thank Gawd for Shit" Campaign: Yes, Christians love to thank Gawd for the good stuff, but when shit happens, they simply forget to thank Gawd for the shit he has wrought forth, hence, the aforementioned campaign.

Jebus Hates Pork!!!

Jebus Hates Porky!!!

In recent days, swine flu panic has swept from Mexico to the United States, and the latest news is that Europe and Asia have also been struck by this malevolent disease. Considering that Jebus never had any liking for the business of pig farming (Jebus, after all, cast demons into pigs, causing those cute little swines to commit needless suicide. Fucking waste of bacon.....), maybe, just maybe, we might want to thank Jebus for the latest round of deadly swine flu???

US declares emergency as Mexico flu death toll rises

Increasing Death Toll

MEXICO CITY, (AFP) - - World health officials stepped up the battle against swine flu after Mexico upped the probable death toll from the epidemic to 103 and the United States declared a public emergency.

Mexican Health Minister Jose Angel Cordova said the number of both suspected and confirmed fatalities from swine flu has reached 103, and the number of those hospitalized due to the epidemic stood at about 400.

The previous probable death toll, announced Saturday, was 81 confirmed and suspected swine flu deaths.

The number of cases under observation in Mexico has reached 1,614, up from 1,324, Cordova said on national television.

Panic grew across the Latin American nation as citizens heeded government warnings to avoid contact with each other.

The United States will screen visitors arriving from infected areas, Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano said Sunday, as 20 cases were confirmed in five states.

Suspected Cases in Europe, Middle East and Asia; Pandemonium Spreads

Suspected cases were also investigated in Europe, the Middle East and Asia , and six new infections were confirmed in Canada.

As thousands of panicked Mexicans wore surgical masks on the streets, President Felipe Calderon called for calm, urging citizens to work with authorities to contain the virus.

Mexico City was deserted Sunday after its 20 million residents were ordered to avoid crowds, and a soccer game at 105,000-seat Aztec stadium was played with no fans.

Thank Gawd for Contaminating Our Pork

Thanking Gawd for shit is no small task; we at Atheist Haven will go further than most of those pusillanimous Christians by thanking God for the most heinous shit that the Divine Father can ever heap at our forlorn, sorry human race.




So here goes: Thank you Lord, for the Swine Flu.

Thank Gawd for Shit!!!

Shit Factor: 6/10. A pretty low score, for the moment. The scores will be more or less settled after we have the raw data coming in, which will reveal to the true extent of human casualties.

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