Its the time of the year again: Easter Sunday never ceases to remind us of the death and resurrection of Jebus for our damn sins (It all began with a talking snake trying to sweet-talk two innocent homo sapiens into eating some fruit from a forbidden tree.....).
As an atheist myself, I have no qualms about celebrating Good Friday & Easter, or any other religious holiday, so long as it is a legitimate excuse for sloth and vindicate myself to laze on what will otherwise be just another working Friday.
Good Food and Good Wine = Cannibalism Plus Vampirism?As for the Christians, they will be heading out to their churches with their families and church friends, most of them oblivious to the fact that Easter was actually stolen from the pagans (The Greek Goddess, Eostre, is attributed to the celebration of Easter). The idea, of course, is to eat the body of Jebus and drink his blood, both represented by a dough and wine, since both mundane items are supposedly "transubstantiated" into gory version of Jebus's slab of meat and blood. Eucharist sure is fun to begin with!!!
Ouch.........Church celebrations aside, some folks in Philippines will be whipping themselves up into a sadomasochistic frenzy, and if you do not fancy yourself being whipped by another pious mate into bloody ribbons, you might want to stay in the confines and comforts of your home, sipping a fine glass of Bloody Mary and eating a slice of bread without sharing the Eucharist with your compatriots in Church (Who knows what fine asses those priestly hands might have been touching....).
Jebus is Watching......Porn???In sum, enjoy thy holidays, and keep yourself in high spirits. Just be wary about doing your nefarious deeds in the privacy of your own homes.....Jebus might be watching. You know, it is his day out, so, he might be a little more voyeuristic than his usual self. And you know what he likes (Hint: Watch out for the hot gay porn in your neighborhood video store.....its flying off the shelf at twice the rate on Easter......)!
Happy Holidays!
Beast FCD
