Tuesday, 2 September 2008

Thank Gawd for Hurricane Gustav!

Man was Created in the Image of Gawd.....Seriously, Dude, Who Wants to Look Like.....THAT!!!!?

Every so often, we are reminded by erstwhile, pious folks that, as mundane creatures on this fragile little planet, our fate rests on the hands of an imaginary deity, who, in his loving kindness is responsible for the creation and survival of our kind. As homo sapiens, we are supposedly the Anointed Ones: Created & blessed (or cursed, if you ask me!) to bear the image of a Cosmic Father who is supposedly bedazzled by our every move. He loves us to itsy bitsy bits, but curiously, he suffers from a credibility problem, because some sections of his beloved Creation just don't seem to think he actually exists, while the majority of his creation are often embroiled in wars to determine just who really is the real "God" (The game "My God's dick is bigger than your God's" is still a terrific ice-breaker for starting wars).

In addition to his great, boundless, "love", he is perceived to be an omnipotent entity: Come rain or shine, hail and storm, droughts and floods, this deity is also a designed weather controller (kind of like the Norwegian God, Thor, when he wields his hammer is responsibly for thunder and lightning) of sorts, which, if evidence of late is to be placed under scrutiny, hasn't placed this all-affable deity in a very flattering light.

Mother Nature's Murderous Ways

Hurricanes: Mother Nature's Handiwork of Death & Destruction

From time to time, Nature tends to unleash its wrath upon its hapless victims: Earthquakes swallowing up and demolishing buildings over large swaths of land; tsunamis, such as the one that was unleashed in 2004 due to an undersea earthquake near Sumatra, are constant reminders of our vulnerability in Nature's grand scheme of things. Indeed, she's always been an evil bitch, and heck, that has always been the way she has conducted her business since the advent of this blue-green blob of a planet: Birth, evolution, destruction, extinction. She's one vicious bitch, and hell yeah we'd all love women who can engage in catfights!

Having said that in jest, we all know that Nature isn't some anthropomorphic deity; it is just a generic term used to describe the general mechanisms of our planet (kind of like describing a ship using "she"; for millennial the sea faring community has always deemed ships to be females, thanks in no part to their "heavy bottoms"). Nature shares neither prejudice nor favor in terms of carnage and murder, and if we observe Nature in her pristine conditions, we are not inclined to attach benign terms, such as "loving kindness", as one of her traits.

Replace Nature with a Cosmic Godfather, however, and one has a huge philosophical problem in his or her hands: How does one reconcile a loving and all-powerful God with the murderous nature of natural disasters?

Praise the Lord for Hurricane Gustav!

When Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans, USA in 2005, it unleashed a water carnage, turning the once-famed jazz country into a watery grave.

Undaunted, some Jebus fans in New Orleans have never ceased in loving God despite his seeming callousness: Either the deity didn't have the cow sense to turn off the celestial tap after shitting, or he simply thought better; a couple of thousand dead folks isn't going to hurt the population of his erstwhile, jewel-in-the-eye humans one bit!

Come 2008, the very town that had suffered the full wrath of Katrina has to endure the rampaging effects of Hurricane Gustave. While much of the town has been evacuated, some stubborn, pious folks seem quite emboldened by the Lord's supposedly divine, weather-altering powers.

According to a Reuters article, window cleaner, Julio Iglesia, is placing his faith on God, who three years ago had pretty much sent much of New Orleans down under (assuming God does exist, albeit a incompetent weather controller!):

"Katrina was here, but God won't let that happen again."

Such comforting words indeed. If a robber robs a bank and gets away scott-free, what are the chances that it will strike a second round, hoping to strike a jackpot. Very high indeed! Even more so when it comes to the game of murder: If God was indeed responsible for the first Hurricane, what is the fun of wrecking a torrid, murderous deluge of water with nary a casualty on a wet, gloomy day?

Ah, the power of faith. For better or for worst, pious sheep will forever be enamored with their Cosmic Mc Muffin. May I suggest one step further: Since religious folks love to pray and thank God for just about everything under the sun (Free sex, good test results, you name it, they will pray and thank God for his supposed blessings upon us mere mortals!), it is no more than an afterthought that pious folks should thank God for the Hurricane!!!

A suggested Lord's prayer:

"Dear Gawd, we thank you for the deluge you have indulged us with in the form of Hurricane Katrina 3 years ago. Unlike the infidels and our damn enemies of your Son, we love you to bits irregardless of the weather, and we thank you once again for this celestial deluge you have heaped upon us. Clearly, Lord, we are part of your Divine Plan, and your continuous plans for us to die, suffer, suffocate and immolate have clearly left an indelible impression upon us: Clearly, your love and benevolence knows no bounds. Amen!"

Amen indeed.

"I am patient with stupidity, but not with those who are proud of it."

-Edith Sitwell